Friday, August 26, 2011

God is still God

Yesterday was one of those tough days in life where I had to hang on to God just to make it through some of the day's events.  And God is still God.

My Mother, who lives here in town has had her dog, Kinzee  for (from what we can figure) over 16 years.  Kinzee has been having some problems with her hips and having trouble getting up and moving around for the last couple of months. The vet had told me on the last visit that it more than likely was an arthritis type problem and would continue to limit her movements.  It has gotten worse this week, she could stand when we picked her up and took her outside, but spent the rest of her time laying on her rug.   And God is still God.

I went over to Mother's yesterday morning and realized that Kinzee was hurting more and sat down and had a talk with Mother.    I think Mother "knew", but of course wanted to hope that there would be something the vet could do to fix what was going on.  And God is still God.

We got out the sheet that I always used in my car when I took Kinzee anywhere and Mother wrapped Kinzee in the sheet and carried her out to my car.   The next couple minutes were spent with Mother talking to Kinzee and then me hugging her and telling her I would let her know when I knew anything.  And God is still God.

When I got to the vet I went in and talked to the receptionist and then took Kinzee into an examintin room and the vet came in.  He examined her and told me that he could give her something to insure she's not hurting, but there was nothing that would "fix" her at that point.   And God is still  God.

He then asked me what I had in mind.  I had been praying the last couple of days that when it was time, that I would make the right decisions and handle it the right way for and with Mother.   I told him I thought it was time and that the best thing was not to let her suffer.  And God is still God.

He talked with me about the procedure and gave me the option of staying with Kinzee or not and of having them take her afterward or my taking her and burying her.  I felt a peacefulness and opted to stay with her, because I knew that Mother would most likely ask and it would be comforting to Mother to know I had been.  And God is still God.

I decided that I would take Kinzee to my house and bury her there.  That way there was a familiar place, where Mother would know she had been buried, as a point of remembrance.  I went to the house and changed clothes and began digging.  I'm not sure exactly what all the emotions were that I was experiencing during that time, however I know there were a flood of them.   I realized that I had never buried a pet by myself.  I realized that this was going to have an emotional impact of loss on Mother.  And God is still God.

When I finished, cleaned up and changed clothes, I went and got Mother some lunch and went to her house.   I walked up to the door and hugged her and told her.  She was shaken and sad.  We sat and talked for a long while, giving her time to take it all in and feel what she was feeling.  And God is still God.

As I felt comfortable leaving Mother for a while, I told her I was going to go back to work for the rest of the afternoon.  I called her early in the afternoon to check on her and could hear the sadness in her voice.   I went by after work to check on her and give her a hug.   And God is still God.

I am not completely sure what all God has and is teaching me through this experience, however one thing I am completely certain of it that God is still God and I am SO dependent on that fact in my life!

~Bonnie

Monday, August 22, 2011

Happy Birthday Daddy

Tuesday, August 23rd.    Daddy's 82nd birthday.   It is hard to realize that he's been gone almost 6 years.  Not a day goes by that I don't think of something that he taught me, one of his silly sayings, how much I would like to call and talk to him about something like we always did.

I am thankful for the example he was to me.  His most evident way of showing me the right way was in the way he lived.  His integrity was something that he didn't talk about, however his life spoke loudly of it. 

I miss you Daddy, Happy Birthday!

Sunday, August 21, 2011

"First Day"

Caleb,

Here it is the day before another "First Day".   Seems like life has many of them planned for each of us.  Some are less emotional, some are extremely tough, however I know you and I know that God is going to help you be successful in every one of your First Days!

As you begin 2nd grade (wow, how time flies!) I want to remind you

......how very much I love you.  That love is unconditional and unending.

.........to always do your best!   I know that in your heart and your way of doing things, that is part of who you are, however it's what my heart needs to say!

.........to let your light shine!   I said that to your Mommy each morning after we prayed as she was going off to her school day and will always say it to you in my heart as I pray for you each morning!    You have already shown me in so many ways how God is working through your life and I am excited and anxious to see what God might do this year!

......I am proud of you!  You are my pride and joy and those aren't just words, they are my heart.  

Caleb, as you begin a new school year, remember that Gramma loves you and is always here for you!

I love you "the number" !

Gramma

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Happy Birthday to My Boy!

August 12, 2011  : )

To my grandson, Caleb,

I am so thankful that God sent me such an amazing and wonderful grandson.

I am thankful that you and I have the special bond we share.

I am thankful that you love to play and laugh and learn.

I am thankful that you always "let your light shine" and are proud of the faith you have in God and His ability to take care of everything.

I am thankful that I know you know how to pray.   I know that when you pray that you believe and that God hears you.

I am thankful that each year you come up with a special theme for your birthday party and you and Gramma get to figure out what the cake will look like, as well as the "cookie cutters" that you love!

I am thankful that we send each other letters in the mail often.   (even ones we send back and forth to give each other a fright)

I am thankful that we get to talk on the phone often to share about our day!

I am thankful for the joy and excitement with life that I can hear in your voice and see in your face.

I am thankful for our songs.

I am thankful for so many reasons, but to sum it up,
      Thank you God for giving me this precious Grandson to bless my life!

I love you "the" number, more than a thousand acres!

                  Happy Birthday to my boy!

Gramma

Monday, August 8, 2011

Wrong Turns?

Have you ever been driving and been pretty sure you knew where you were and where you were going and made one wrong turn and ended up completely off track and ultimately lost? 

Have you ever thought about the fact that regardless of how completely lost you become, you are able to find your way back to familar places?   


Have you ever noticed that at times the familar places aren't necessarily the most ideal place for you to be, however you still go back there rather than strike out in a search of the ideal place?


Are we as humans more determined to not be considered lost on our journey than we are in being true to ourselves and being in the ideal place?


Do we make the decision to go on the path more traveled rather than making a decision to step out on a path that is the right path for ourselves?

Just some thought provoking questions that have been going through my mind!

Bonnie